Feeling less sexy recently? Blame exams
Sexiness. It goes beyond pretty or ugly. It’s in an image and an attitude. And it’s something I think the British culture is pretty much devoid of. I refer to the English language, slightly better than German but we’re never gonna beat the French. Their word for bin is poubelle. They make bins sexy. In my four years of Leeds, I’ve seen a lot of bins. Not one of them sexy.
Of course, before I am accused of being a traitor to Great Britain, I will admit there are sexy British humans: Kate Winslet, Colin Firth. But I’m afraid they are sprinkled in between the likes of Kerry drug-guzzling Katona and Stacey wow-that’s-your-real-voice Solomon. This isn’t an attack on supermarket advertising, but I do think they’d be making more money if their tagline was something like ‘That’s why sex panthers go to Iceland’. Then again, our supposedly more ‘sexy’ representatives like Caggie and Millie from Made in Chelsea really do make me wonder what it is to be sexy in Britain today. An unyielding gurn-pout or the inability to tonally invert a sentence; these are my options? In the words of Stacey Solomon, ‘Nah faanks.’
Leeds is better known for its attractive students; it’s a brilliant coincidence or a dark conspiracy. Having recently had friends to stay from East-Anglia Uni, I was reminded that even a trip to Sainsbury’s was far more aesthetically pleasing in Hyde Park than whatever ugly place they live in. However, I would refute the notion that Leeds is ‘sexy’ (yeah, I write essays). It’s just a little bit too grubby to get that title. And worryingly, this time of year in Leeds means levels of sexy are at an all time low.
The look of not bothering can be aloof and sexy, but only up to a point. The moment you’re worried about looking bald because your hair is so greasy and tightly pulled back, I think that’s the moment you left sexy town. That’s unfair, I’m sure other people wash their hair. Yet, I’d still say that Leeds is too bloody kooky and a bit too fashionable to fully unlock its sexy potential. I think this just as a gaggle of girls walk past wearing creepers; shoes so special that, if there were a spectrum for footwear, they would be on the extreme end of it.
Don’t get me wrong, sexiness is definitely not all about looks. Nevertheless, it does involve a certain positive outlook on life or a mysterious streak. Sadly, if my most recent conversations in the library with fellow students have anything to go by… we not so sexy right now. Some chats have simply cut down to a roll of the eyes, a huff, or pulling the face of a baby wailing- just me? Others have been full-on, detailed rants about the most mundane sections of a student’s day involving a library book and an email saying it’s been recalled. If they spent that ranting-time reading, maybe I could get my hands on that book I recalled.
I won’t lie, sometimes I’m not even that stressed but I just feel like I have to get on board with the bad mood to validate my presence in the library. Even so, if you’re faking it or you feel like your degree is the worst thing that’s happened to you in a while, well, as self-appointed sexy-decider, ‘honey, you ain’t sexy’. But there’s hope. Maybe not right now, sure. But soon. When all these exams are done. Honeys gonna start washing their hair and putting on make up. Fellas gonna start smiling and wearing real trousers. It’s gonna be a great and sexy time for all of Leeds!
Pic from http://www.ineedmotivation.com/blog/2008/04/tired-7-ways-to-cure-fatigue-instantly/